Just Another Black Male Unemployed In New York City

The other day I became aware of a statistic: 50% of Black Males in NYC are unemployed. Well that number stuck with me because technically, I am one of that 50%.

The last 9 months or so I have applied for jobs, worked temporary gigs ranging from advocacy work, freelance writing, production work, and driving friends around – all to make money to stay afloat. I suppose I am what we would call UnderEmployed – I make barely enough to pay my bills and keep food on the table and I am constantly looking for new opportunities and sifting through old ones to stay on top of places I have pitched myself to.

Today I discussed with a friend the challenge that this has done to my psyche. We talked about how in our capitalist society we tend to define ourselves based on what we produce. I have been no different. I see friends who have employment and are able to pursue a cause or an agenda relentlessly because they have the backing of a larger institution. That is not the case when you are unattached. People do not pay attention to you when you are unattached.

For those of us in the Underemployed category our conversations and interactions are a constant negotiation of strategic interests and timing. When people ask: “what do you WANT to do?” a sharp shiver shoots up my spine that prevents me from responding the way I WANT to respond. When you have been looking for work as long as I have the conversation about what you WANT to do changes dramatically. I WANT to write novels and be creative. Is that a reality at the current moment?  – No.

My MPA degree has placed me in direct competition with a legion of discharged bankers and their business world refugees. Legions of these men and women are now looking to the relatively safe service and government sectors as bunkers in these hard times. They apply for management positions and look better equipped to take on higher levels of responsibility than others. While this may or may not be true, the overall obsession with people with business experience is bankrupting our civic and public sectors. Those business rejects have only come to mission driven work out of a need to bridge the gap not to do the work.

As I enter into a very thin freelancing period I continue to be humbled. Not only is making ends meat increasingly difficult, but staying focused difficult as well. I know few people that have, in these economic times, maintained a certain lifestyle while having virtually no safety net. I am not eligible for unemployment benefits and have no person to bail me out. I have gained personal momentum in this time and confidence but that wanes in the daily onslaught of reality – choices must be made.

Two things stand out to stay mindful of:

1. I put myself in this situation – whether consciously or not.

2. I need to remember that it is not what we produce that defines our existence as human beings; it is the quality and nature of our human relationships. I am a brother, a son, a friend, etc.

Comments

[sean saifa]

brother, you don't know me, but i came across your blog by reading through my friend, maceo's blog. i hear you and i am in the same boat. all love and strength my brother. we are riding on the history of a strong and resilient people. we will make it through and live well.

[manju]

sending you love and best wishes on the journey. keeping my eyes open for possibilities to shoot your way. you're so brilliant and capable.

[Rusell Knowing]

I lost my job last month and found work here on www.bigjobsboard.com

Don't lose hope...

[FrankPain]

This is really bad news, especially for me because I am a new MPA student, hopefully things turn around !!!